First Heart Break At 18

So where can I start .... Okie so I'm the youngest among four ,while growing up the only person who loves me was my dad. Well my elder siblings hate me like I said I was the youngest always being pampered. Everything changes when I was 13 I wasn't getting the same amount of love from my dad like how he used to . So I entered secondary school, I was just innocent ,fat shy girl . Starting of the year I didn't have much friend, so to cut the story short in middle of the year , had couple of friends and each of them were couple. Seeing them holding hands, and I was the only single one I always wonder "will anyone love a fat girl like me"?. Fast forward to sec 2 ending of the year for the first time I fell in love but it only lasted for 11 month because he was literally cheating on me for whole 11 month but it wasn't pain all I did was cried for 3 days I was fine

Here it all began ....... it was my 3rd year of secondary school I was chatting with this guy (I'm gonna call him t-rex ) so one day I bump into t-rex and we just look at each other and turn away for some reason. So once I reached home I received a text from him saying that he was shy to talk to me and stuff, so I didn't make it into a issue . So fast forward to us being 6 months together it was fine till one day . So from my school to his house was like 3 stops so after school everyday I would see him. On that particular day he was super sick and I was on my way to his place with my friends. So T-Rex called, Before I said Hi I laugh because of my friend said something . T-Rex was so mad that I laugh, I was so scared like I said I was soft hearted , Upon arriving under his block he walked super fast towards me , dragged me to the ground where there was glasses scatted everywhere , he pulled my hair and slap me . I didn't know I was bleeding on my knees . From that onwards for 2 years he abused me for every little thing. He would bang my head against the wall ,staircase metal railing . Sometimes the reasons are stupid like he didn't allow me to go for my graduation, when I told him that i wanted to go he pulled my hair and bang my head against the wall . By the time when it was our 1 year anniversary he became like a psycho ,where he was scold my parents to me . It was bad for 2 years i stayed and still loved him.

It was our first year in collage ,he started being different . He would walked like far away from me, everything about him was different ,but sadly the abused remains. Around March he broke up with me for someone else , I was so devastated ,my heart felt so pain . That was my FIRST HEARTBREAK there's was never a day I went to sleep without crying , in mean time for 4 weeks I texted him to come back to me ,attempted suicide multiple times. It was so painful where I just wanted to end my life. For 3 Months I cried silently in my pillow , losing alot of weights . My depression where was so bad where I will self harm ,cut my wrist ,burn my thigh . I won't talked to anyone I would literally shut everyone out . Forgot to mention when I met T-rex I was 70kg after two years I went down to 42kg . After 3 months I finally moved on with a help with my close friends . Out of no where T-rex came back saying he wanted me back , we talked on the one for many hours while he was still with his new girlfriend . But luckily I was strong enough to not fall in his trap again, After 2 months I met my love of my life(gonna name him "dibo" ) on my birthday .

Its been 4 years since my depression, I'm still happily in love with Dibo never felt happier or better . He takes good care of me , I'm insanely in love with him . Maybe sometimes we just have to go thru shits to have a happy ending.