Before you text him

I know you want to text him. Him who? That one person who clicked in your mind when you read the word 'him'. Don't deny now , i know he obviously flashed infront of your eyes. His eyes , his cute smile , the way he used to caress his hair with his fingers ,you instantly remembered that musky smell of his favorite deodorant and whatnot.

I know it might have been really long since you last talked with each other. The memories , the sweet talks , the coquettish talks , those brisk cheek and forehead kisses , the way he always used to hold you , you start creating scenarios in your head with him while watching a Romantic movie or a show, you start to feel nostalgic. You want to call and see if he's doing fine .You want to know if he is hurting as badly as you're hurting. Trust me darling, he is not. He is perfectly fulfilled with the damage that he has done to you. If he had any regrets, he would have called you long ago. He knows you're hurting, that's exactly how he wants it. He knows he still has that power over you. He knows if he drops a text or calls you , you'll immediately pick and respond without giving a second thought. He knows if he invites you to spend time with him you'll be there in a blink of an eye. Do not give him the satisfaction that he is right. Do not make him think for once that he still can exert his power on you.

You are better than his lies and his sugar coated sweet talks. Before, you simply throw away all the healing you went on your own - Remember all the lies he's told. Remember all the promises he's broken. Remember all of the times he disappointed you and made you cry. Remember how he used to manipulate you into thinking that he was right and you weren't. Don't trick yourself into believing he was perfect for you when you know that isn't the case. you deserve someone who pictures their entire life with you. You deserve someone who brings you peace not his narcissism. You deserve someone who have so much respect for you .You have grown up so much now. You have mend the broken pieces of your heart on your own .You have a heart so pure and filled with love, the world needs your kindness. Don't let your kindness hide behind a fake mean mask because of that one person, you're not like that .Girl, you deserve the whole universe. We are waiting for the new and evolved you, the better version of you. 

~Tanya Shrivastava 

@tanyaashrivastavaa